Edging is a super easy-to-do practice that literally anyone can incorporate into their sex lives. If you’re looking for a way to last longer or have more satisfying, mind-blowing orgasms (either by yourself or with a partner), give edging a shot!
Why do people enjoy doing it so much, and what is edging exactly? We’ve got all the basics you need to start edging today.
What Is Edging?
Essentially, edging is a technique you can use to delay your own or your partner’s orgasm. It involves sexual stimulation that is stopped just before the point of orgasm (or going “over the edge,” so to speak).
Edging can be used by any gender, as it’s not specific to any type of anatomy — we love non-gender-biased sexual techniques! After all, doesn’t everyone deserve more fulfilling orgasms? The world might be better if people who wanted to could just get off more regularly.
There are benefits to edging besides feeling good. So what are they, you ask? Let’s take a peek.
What Are the Benefits of Edging?
Why would you want to wait to have an orgasm? Isn’t the entire point of having sex to get off? There are actually a lot of benefits associated with adding a little edging to your sexual routine.
For instance, people who regularly incorporate edging often report having more intense orgasms. We’d love to tell you that there is no such thing as a mediocre orgasm, but they exist on a continuum, and there’s nothing more frustrating than getting there only to be met with an “eh” climax. Edging can help take your orgasms to a whole new level.
There is a discrepancy in the arousal times between those with a penis and those with a vulva, and it can be a major source of annoyance and dissatisfaction. Edging can help bridge the gap and ensure everyone can get off successfully.
The technique can also help increase sexual stamina, especially if you were assigned male at birth. Eventually, with regular practice, you can last longer and pull yourself back to allow your partner time to catch up. It’s perfect for those marathon sex sessions you never want to end!
But most importantly, edging helps keep you mindful and brings awareness to your body. It can be fun to lose yourself in a sexual encounter, but that also means you don’t focus nearly as much on how you feel and what makes you feel good.
When you practice edging, you learn what turns you on and what gets you off, which can empower you to have more self-confidence in the bedroom. It’s not about being selfish; it’s about being your own sexual advocate.
Why Does Edging Feel So Good?
There hasn’t been a lot of research on why edging feels so good, but we have some theories. We all have a dopaminergic reward system, a function of the brain that releases a hormone called dopamine when we’ve done something good.
Dopamine makes us feel good, so having more of it in the body will lead to a rush of happiness and good vibes. When you practice edging, having an orgasm is even more rewarding than usual — so you get that same rush of pleasure that comes with getting off in addition to the extra dopamine. The build-up really does pay off!
However, just like every sexual practice, edging isn’t for everyone. If you have trouble regularly reaching orgasm (even by yourself), this technique may not be for you.
Is It Possible To Try Edging on Yourself?
Absolutely! It’s arguably easier to use edging on yourself because you know best when you’re getting close to the edge. You can use the technique with your sex toys (try a vibrator and plenty of lube to test yourself even further) or with manual penile or clitoral stimulation.
Try it for yourself during your next masturbation sesh, and see for yourself just how much more satisfying your orgasms can be when you make yourself wait for them. Patience is a virtue and all.
We’d recommend that everyone try edging by themselves before taking it to their partner. It gives you an excellent baseline for how long you usually last, and you and your partner can try to beat your best time!
What Are Some Edging Techniques?
Most edging techniques follow a pretty easy pattern:
- The person edging is sexually aroused and stimulated until they are close to orgasm.
- Once they’re at the “edge,” stimulation is either stopped or reduced until the feeling goes away.
- Sexual arousal and stimulation are increased again, bringing them back to the point of climax.
Rinse and repeat until you or your partner are ready to explode!
You can also vary the technique to make it work better for you. For example, people with penises who deal with premature ejaculation can use a variation known as the stop-start method. Instead of backing off a little bit before you get off, you’ll wait 30 seconds before starting back up again.
Some people also use the squeeze method, where they squeeze the tip of their penis while waiting 30 seconds. However, this method can be more difficult for people with extra sensitivity, as the touch may send them over the edge.
You can use edging in a BDSM sexual practice. Also known as orgasm control, the dominant partner (or “top”) controls when the submissive partner (the “bottom”) is allowed to orgasm.
If your partner has a vulva and you really want to tease them, try a few drops of Awaken Arousal Oil on their vulva and clitoris. The oil will heighten their arousal and sensation even further, and they’ll be begging you to let them get off.
Regardless of how you incorporate edging into your sexual activity, always use plenty of lube. Extended periods of foreplay or sexual intercourse can get uncomfortable, and you don’t want friction to take you out of the moment and make all of that build-up be for nothing.
The point of edging is to make it hurt so good, not just hurt in general.
How Long Can You Use Edging?
A common question people ask when starting to use edging is how long they should continue practicing it before giving in. There is no “right” or “wrong” answer here, and the more you use the technique, the better you’ll be able to judge what works best for your body.
It comes down to healthy communication if you’re using edging with a partner. Unless you consent to use it in a dominant/submissive context, edging isn’t about being tortured. Communicate with your partner, even during sexual pleasure, so they know when you’re ready to hit the point of no return. It’s not a punishment — it’s a delayed reward.
We also want to address a common misconception — “blue balls” is not one of the side effects of practicing edging. There’s even some question about whether “blue balls” is truth or just a myth (try telling that to the boys you messed around with in high school, though). You aren’t going to hurt yourself (or your partner) by delaying orgasm.
Conclusion
So, what is edging? The physical sensations that come along with cumming are awesome all on their own. But when you combine them with a little delayed gratification, your orgasms may very well be the best you’ve ever had.
Try incorporating edging into your sex life and see just how good it can feel to enjoy the build-up.
Sources:
Study finds sex differences in relationship between arousal and orientation | APA
Dopaminergic reward system: a short integrative review | PMC
Premature Ejaculation: Aetiology and Treatment Strategies | PMC
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